Sand Castles

Children in their play, build castles of sand. And when the play is over, walk away. Its we, adults, the so called wise ones, who fall in love with such games and claiming every grain of sand for our own, weep salt tears of misery.

doings of this world,
child's play, abandoned
on shores of time
to be broken and built 
again and again

Homecoming And Farewell

Every year, she counted days for his visit and when she saw him, her heart surged in joy. But she found that her eyes and ears, feasting on his beloved form, also looked for ways in which he had changed, living so far away, adapting to an alien culture and climate. Hidden in her happiness was this fear, that as years go by, one day he will become this stranger and try as she might, she will not be able to find in him, her child.

*****************************

It was time for her child to go back to where he lived, a few thousand miles away. She felt the heaviness seep out from her heart into her limbs. She would not be able to see, touch or feed him for another year.Yet she knew at the core of her being, that though these comings and goings will continue, the bond that tied them together, the silver cord was indestructible.

*******************

Last night, holding on to the cold metal railing, she had watched her child's red tee shirt till it became a speck and disappeared in the vast insides of the airport. Today, with the humdrum of daily life around her, she decided that she will befriend the numb heaviness in her chest, that she will not push or talk it away.She will accept and hold it close till of its own accord, it dissolves in the warmth of her being.

Freedom

Recently, a young woman, apprehensive at the prospect of her in-laws moving in with her, said to me that this might curb her freedom. It set me thinking about freedom. Is it something that is given to me by another? But then it can always be taken away and so is not genuinely mine. Or can it be a seed which has to be planted within me, nurtured and grown? The seed of self worth. I nurture it by valuing, protecting, honoring my needs, desires, inclinations, and all that defines me. I do so by assertive behavior which protects my individuality and at the same time respects another's.I neither encroach nor allow encroachment. And this is something I have to work at within. A prerequisite is introspection which results in self awareness and self knowledge.This self knowledge leads to self love, and then one does not deny oneself to please another. Fruit of freedom grows on the fully grown tree of self worth. It belongs to me and cannot be taken away, no matter what happens outside.

Rumi on Love

Friends,
look at love how it tangles
with the one fallen in love
look at spirit how it fuses with earth
giving it a new life.
Why are you so busy
with this or that, or good or bad?
Pay attention to how things blend
be like sugarcane, sweet yet silent
don't get entangled with bitter words.

Remember friends,
if you are seeking closeness to Beloved,
then love everyone.
Whether in their presence or absence,
see only their good.
If you want to be as clear and refreshing
as the breath of the morning breeze
or like the sun having nothing but warmth and light,
then love everyone.

Friends,
There is a candle in your heart, ready to be kindled.
There is a void in your soul, ready to be filled.
You feel it, don't you?
You feel the separation from the Beloved.
Invite Him to fill you up, embrace the fire.
Remind those who tell you otherwise that
Love comes to you of its own accord,
and the yearning for it cannot be learned in any school.

Friends,
How long can you beg and bargain
for material things of this world
while Love is waiting?
How long before
you can rise beyond
how I am and what I am?

Are you fleeing from Love
because of a single setback?
Except knowing how to spell the word,
what else do you really know about Love?
How can you talk about Love
if you haven't really heard about Love
even from the lovers?

Love is neither a tale nor a game.
Love is such a powerful torrent
that no one can stand in front of it.
Love is the flame which, when it blazes,
consumes everything other than the Beloved.

Love is reckless; not reason.
Reason seeks a profit.
Love comes on strong, consuming herself, unabashed.
Love comes with a knife,
not some shy question,
and not with fears for its reputation.


Love is the purest wine.
Kings would give away their thrones
for just the smell of
that special wine of love
which lovers drink
at the assembly of heart.

Love is a cloud that scatters pearls.
Love is a shining light, exalted;
a secret river, purified and ever-flowing.
Love is a burning fire
that never gets extinguished.
Love goes together with suffering,
but being in love
is the greatest of all feelings.

Love isn't the work of the tender and the gentle;
Love is the struggle of the toughest wrestlers.
Don't ask anyone about Love;
ask only Love about Love.

Love is the whole thing,
we are only pieces.
Love is the sea of no end,
we are just a drop of it.
Without Love, even the stars
get eclipsed and extinguished.

Love boils the oceans like boiling pots.
Love pulverizes the mountains like grinding sands.
Love drills a hundred holes through the sky.
Love trembles the earth like a devastating quake.

From Love, bitter becomes sweet.
From Love, thorns become flowers.
From Love, vinegar becomes wine.
From Love, fire becomes light.
From Love, devil becomes angel.
From Love, sorrow becomes joy.
From Love, sickness becomes health.
From Love, fury becomes mercy.
From Love, dead becomes alive.
From Love, king becomes servant.

Love knows a hundred different ways of showing off.
Love flirts with a lover all the time,
knowing how to flirt back with Love,
that's how you get your hands on Love!

Love is always loyal.
Love demands your absolute loyalty.
Love won't even look at a disloyal lover.
Love is the only food for a starving lover.
Without love, you're just a meaningless facade.

If you're not still in love,
hurry and find the love of your life.
Quench your thirst for Love,
Beloved is also always thirsty for a lover.

Any lover who's truly in love
cannot be bound to a loveless way of life.
Put your full trust only in Love
because Love is your only salvation.

Friends, don't just look for Love,
look for the one who is also looking for Love.
But why do you even have to look?
Love is not lost, Love is right here,
closer than your own arteries and veins,
It's you who always sets up barriers
between yourself and Love.

Friends,
if you could get rid
of yourself just once,
the secret of secrets
would open to you.
The face of the unknown,
hidden beyond the universe
would appear on the
mirror of your perception.

If you could distance yourself
from your selfish self,
all heavenly spirits
would stand ready to serve you.
If you could finally hunt down
your own beastly self,
you have the right
to claim Solomon's kingdom.

You are that blessed soul who
belongs to the garden of paradise,
is it fair to let yourself
fall apart in a shattered house?
You are the bird of happiness
in the magic of existence,
what a pity! Why you let
yourself be chained and caged?

Break free!
Break free from this dark prison
called material world,
soon you will see
you are the sage and the fountain of life.

Friends,
don’t be discouraged
compassion always comes after trouble.
Don’t put on any dress but Love
don’t cover yourself with any garment but Love.
Love will open your heart,
start walking towards Love
Your legs will get heavy and tired
then comes a moment of feeling
the wings you've grown,
lifting.

Love rests on no foundation
Love is an endless ocean,
with no beginning or end.
Imagine,
a suspended ocean
riding on a cushion of ancient secrets.

When in love,
body, mind, heart, and soul don't even exist.
Become this: fall in love,
and you will not be separated again.

If Love slips out of your hand
don’t fall into despair,
keep on searching
keep on fighting until you find Love again.

Knock,
and Love will open the door.
Vanish,
and Love will make you shine like the sun.
Fall,
and Love will raise you to the heavens.
Become nothing,
and Love will turn you into everything.

Be drunk with Love,
for Love is all that exists
Where is intimacy found
if not in the give and take of Love.

If they ask you what Love is,
say: the sacrifice of will.
If you haven't already left your will behind,
you have no will at all.

The lover is a king of kings
with both worlds beneath him;
and a king does not regard
what lies at his feet.

Only Love and the lover
can resurrect beyond time
Give your heart to Love;
the rest is second-hand.

Reason is powerless
in the expression of Love.
Love alone is capable of revealing
the truth of Love and being a lover.
If you want to live, die in Love;
die in Love if you want to remain forever alive.

The agony of lovers
burns with the fire of passion.
Lovers leave traces of where they've been.
The wailing of a lover's broken heart
is the doorway to Beloved.

Lovers weave baskets of love
even with their hands cut off.
It is in the non-existence
where lovers pitch their tents of love.

Lovers don't finally meet somewhere
They're in each other all along.
Let your song of love be always heard
This is the message of Sufi mystics.

~ Jalal Ud Deen Rumi 

On Permanence

We seek permanence in our relationships and then are miserable when we find the threads slipping from our hands. For in this transient world, can anything be held on to? When the body, through which I experience the world, is itself an everchanging phenomenon, what else can be permanent? That which seeks to hold, is itself as fluid as a flowing river. And yet, at another level, every relationship is permanent. Goes on and on, changing time, space and form. I'm fascinated by the paradoxes that make up this life.

************************

Children in their play, build castles of sand. And when the play is over, walk away. Its we, adults, the so called wise ones, who fall in love with such games and claiming every grain of sand for our own, weep salt tears of misery.

****************
doings of this world,
child's play, abandoned
on shores of time
to be broken and built again
and again

Birthday

November 14, 2013 

My grandmother did not know the day of her birth. Neither did my parents. My grandparents were not serious about recording this information. It was not really considered important in those days. What was known was that my mother was born on a Krishna janmashtami and my father on a Durgashtami. So birthdays were not really a big deal in the home I grew up in. On my birthday, my mum cooked a big degchi of gajar halwa, because I loved it. And that was it.

In old days, when asked about time of their birth, people would say vague things like it was the year the big storm came or the village temple was made.They would not find the question particularly relevant. Probably, its still the same in rural, traditional cultures. I don't really know.

So I wonder what celebrating birthdays has given us. This constant clocking of years.This measuring of time. I am of a certain age. And so I should think, feel and behave accordingly. In other words, be age appropriate. I slot myself in boxes, labelled Young, Midddle aged or Old. I have been around for half a century. Such a long time, OMG! So now my twilight years are approaching, my time is running out, what have I really done with my life and so on. I find myself, riddled with a bunch of neuroses, pertaining to the calendar.

Counting years results in conditioning of the mind. It tells the mind that it is getting older along with the associated implications. I wonder, how this aging of the mind impacts the aging of the body as both are so well connected.

What if I had never seen a calendar? What if I did not know how old I was? What if I had never ever heard of birthday celebrations?

How old will I feel today?

Connection

November 16, 2013 near Bangalore · Edited

There can be a strange, powerful kind of intimacy between people who meet randomly in buses, trains, planes etc and know that they in all probability, will never meet again. Has happened to me several times and each such memory is unforgettable. Met a young woman in a crowded bus today, began speaking, and in the next half an hour, some amazing sharing happened. I think, in the randomness, namelessness of such meetings, there is no need for defenses to come up, no time for expectations to be born and so a true connection happens. It touches me, moves me in an indescribable way, makes me feel truly human. Nothing gives me a bigger high than this. A pure connection with another human being.